Noynoy Aquino, People Power III and Coffee

September 26th, 20095:26 pm @ elmot

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Noynoy Aquino, People Power III and Coffee




This is a dangerous idea.  No, this is not Sen. Lito Lapid’s idea.

I have heard about this a couple of times already during some casual conversations with coffee buddies and officemates.  And some people on Facebook have actually floated the idea as they commented on my very famous Noynoy Aquino post which has by the way landed on the top spot of Big G since I published it.  (Big G:  Are you under influence Elmot?)  Yes, got so much caffeine lately that I now think I am a coffee bean.

Going back, what if Noynoy Aquino loses his hair?  Oh, he already does.

Here: What if Noynoy Aquino is trounced on his bid for the presidency?

A couple of friends and a total stranger who looks like Angelina Jolie on his FB pic but with a name of Restituto actually resonated the same confident and overexcited answer:  “Eh di, People Power na uli!” (Well, that simply means another People Power!)  While the other one actually said, “Eh di mag-People Power tayo!” (Then let us mount another People Power!)

Like a boring telenovela on primetime with the same stupid recycled characters and predictable plots of killing all the good men brutally by hurling them from the 200th floor, we may simply push down the “off” button of the remote control and head without delay to a very tempting Facebook quiz about sex positions that tells your kind of character after hearing this idea.

This is simply a figment of one’s very fertile imagination some would immediately assert, and just kill the issue with kamikaze fighters flying out from Malacañang Palace.  But I think there is some little possibility for this one to happen.

How?

This is the real game of political spinsters and sinister plotters; one that has been perfected by only a select sect of ugly-looking politicians and political strategists lurking on dark street corners.

Step 1: Portray Noynoy Aquino as the heir, the crown Prince of Philippine democracy and root this to the euphoria of the people.  Attribute to him and his candidacy as the answer from the heavens to the collected litanies and prayers of a nation crying desperately for an overflowing supply of signature clothes and pirated CDs of sex scandals.  Inculcate to the minds and consciousness of the people that it is the “clamour of the nation” for him to run and save us from the pit of national damnation.  Make everyone believe that everyone is actually wanting for Noynoy, even the protesting farmers of Hacienda Luisita.

Step 2: Portray the administration as the “evil Step-Mom” that needs to be exorcised by Fr. Felmar; that there is no other way around but to put a stop to all the plundering, lies, deceit and Presidential boob jobs.  Float the idea that election fraud is being cooked all this time at the Presidential kitchen by bogus election chefs and over-obedient generals just for the bad guys to win the seemingly one-sided presidential race that favors Noynoy.

Step 3: When Noynoy Aquino is defeated on the presidential elections either squarely or due to election fraud, the public should be instigated and all his supporters that he simply was cheated by the bad guys and the menu they cooked was indeed aldente.  Inflame the public outrage and boredom; push the people to go out the streets handing over free fried chicken with rice on plastic containers and free movie pass for the screening of “All My Life Part 2”.  Invite the Sex Bomb Dancers during protests and rallies to keep the people heavily anchored on their seats.  Let your battle cry be for change and freedom from the oppression of hoodlum traditional politicians and incessant boob jobs, flawed butt augmentation and relentless mason work on Madam Auring’ poker face.  Call the people to go out the streets and protest and push for a People Power III like what his mother has led during the Marcos regime.

See?  It is not at all so impossible.

This is how one becomes when over caffeinated.

Care for a coffee on my comment form?  What do you think will the people’s reaction when Noynoy Aquino will not win the bid for the Presidency aside from maybe Kris getting pissed off for losing her house?  Is another People Power possible?

Image from Ballistics Coffee Boy

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