Laugh Till You Drop: The Unlikely Clown at Your Sidebar

August 28th, 2009 → 3:38 pm @ elmot

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Laugh Till You Drop: The Unlikely Clown at Your Sidebar

Before this month comes to close, I would like to at least give homage to our celebration of our Buwan ng Wika or Month of our National Language.

Browsing over the pages of my blog and contemplating of sporting a new theme (since my current BizzArtic Theme has given me bizzaare results and caused only confusion to my visitors and readers), came into my probing eyes is the H2H plugin or what is commonly known as the Translator plugin for our blog posts translating them into many different languages.

This online translator does the chore of making our blog posts comprehensible to those who do not understand the language we use; for example translating our blog posts written in Filipino into Mandarin or Spanish.  That is an instant Mandarin and Spanish Translator on your sidebar.  And many more such as French, English, Japanese, German translators right at your fingertips!

And hey, giving all the Russian spammers some helping hand in understanding at least something that we have written before they post their trash full of incomprehensible letters and symbols on our comment forms.

So using the unconventional, I tried this language translator on my own blog!  Guess what language I chose to translate my english post?  Voila, the flag with red, blue, white and three stars and a moon!  Ooooppss, sorry, three stars and a sun rather.  LOL!

Guess what, that translator did not only served as an online translator for bloggers and readers but in reality disguising itself as a joker.

Here are some of the blog posts I have that this surprisingly funny plugin have translated into Filipino:

  • Masyadong Bastos Gamit ang Party-list System PoOf!  (bastos sila talaga, grrr!)
  • P1 Pondong Pampulitika, Dapat Ko Bang Sing Hallelujah? (Ano I sing ko?)
  • Babala: Minor sa Maluwag na PAGCOR!  (Maluwag???!  Bloggista, ano raw ung maluwag? LOL)
  • Sen. Jamby Madrigal ang Makapal ang Mukha Presidential Kampanya sa Pres. Aquino’s Libing.  Leche!  (Sya nagtranslate nyan, di ako nagmura, LOL!)
  • Panalong Laban sa Blogging’s Dark Side; Morsels ng Wisdom Mula sa Jedi Bloggers  (Panalo na nga eh, obvious ba?!)
  • Bakit Sigurado Pulitiko Paggawa ng Kanilang mga Puwit Out Upang Magkaroon ng Pagkapangulo.  Ako Asking.  PoOf!  (nagpa-butt augmentation din sila??!)
  • Ang Blogger Sino Showered Me Sa Stars  (patay, isho-shower daw ako sa stars, LOL!
  • Huwag Sabihin sa Iyong Mga Bata Di Upang Lie?  (conyo si mommy?)
  • Hindi ko Pwede Intindihin Bakit Pulitiko Say ang Darndest na Bagay (isa pang conyo? LOL!)
  • Isang Kalbo Joke at Ilang Mga Hayden Cameras (sinong kalbo?!)
  • Mag-ingat:  Manny Pacquio ay Isang Multo!  (naku, multo pala si Manny? Lagot ka kay PacMommy!)

How about that one mga friends?  Grabe, I was so loka, with all the English conyo of the translator from Google!  Can’t intindi anymore kung which is the tama talaga, but all I know is that it made me really tawa!  LOL!

Want some more mga friends?  Eto are the translations of the ginawa kong post sa Top Ten Emerging Influential Blogs:  The Return of Darth Vader before.  Specially featured ay the translations of my malupit na action-packed na posts about Roy, Zorlone at Jan.

Let me una kay Doc  Zorlone:

Doc Z ay enjoying pa rin ang kanyang siyesta, ang isang natutulog na kagandahan para sa mga tatlong oras ngayon. He thought he was only dreaming when a hot chick suddenly turned into an ugly creature. Siya lamang ang pag-iisip na siya ay pangangarap kapag ang isang mainit na sisiw biglang pinatay sa isang pangit na likha. He was still half-naked when he saw that everything is real. Siya pa rin medyo hubad kapag siya ay nakita ko na ang lahat ng bagay ay tunay. The monster with his crooked sword chopped Doc Z’s water-bed into two flooding his room. Ang halimaw sa kanyang baluktot na tabak tinadtad Doc Z’s water-bed sa dalawang pagbaha sa kanyang kuwarto. He then jumped off his nearby CD player and immediately pushed the “play” button. Siya ay kumuha ng puwesto pagkatapos ay bumaba ang kanyang mga malapit na CD player at kaagad hunhon ang “play” button. “I will never dance again, guilty feet, got no rhythm.” To this, the monster was in trance and started to dance asking for the aircon to be turned on. “Hindi pa ako ay sayaw muli, nagkasala paa, got walang ritmo.” Upang ito, ang halimaw ay sa kawalan ng ulirat at nagsimulang sumayaw na humihiling para sa aircon na nabuksan. Doc Z saw the opportunity to kill the beast and took his laptop; aimed his video cam and took his stethoscope that flashed a laser beam on the monster. Doc Z Nakita ko ang pagkakataon upang patayin ang mga hayop at kinuha ang kanyang laptop; naglalayong kanyang video cam at kinuha ang kanyang istetoskopyo na flashed isang Laser poste sa halimaw. Kaboom! Kaboom! “That is what you call a Ghostbuster scandal dude. “Iyon ay kung ano ang tawag mo ang isang dude Ghostbuster iskandalo. Kawabangga!” Kawabangga! “

LOL!  Doc Z, di ka pa namin seen that you are nakahubad ha, LOL!


This is naman kay Kuya Roy:

Ito ay isang tamad araw para Roy na brainstorming pa rin para sa mga post para sa kanyang 13 mga blog sa kanyang maaliwalas sopa na binili sa blogging, habang hithit ng kanyang sariling bersyon ng steroid: kape. A good idea suddenly popped up from this spiritual director for his post. Ng isang magandang ideya biglang binusa up na ito mula sa espirituwal na direktor para sa kanyang mga post. But a slimy monster with 15 eyes, 5 hands and 3 feet jumped off the new sofa of this Knight. Subalit sa isang malansa halimaw na may 15 mga mata, 5 mga kamay at paa 3 kumuha ng puwesto off ang bagong sopa ng Knight. “I will kill you! “Ako ang pumatay sa iyo! Grr!” said the monster. Grr! “Said ang halimaw. Roy saw how dirty his new sofa now was and got so angry at the despicable sight. Roy Nakita ko kung paano marumi ang kanyang bagong sopa ngayon ay at got ito galit sa kasuklam-suklam paningin. He rolled up his sleeves and took the stance of a true warrior. Siya lilis ang kanyang manggas at kinuha ang tindig ng isang tunay na mandirigma. As the monster was ready to pop up one of its ugly bulging toxic eyes, Roy took his hot coffee and poured it over the monster. Tulad ng halimaw ay handa na pop up ang isa sa kanyang pangit nakaumbok dahil sa lason mata, Roy kinuha ang kanyang mainit na kape at poured ito sa ibabaw ng halimaw. The monster was burned and screamed to death, and Roy took the opportunity to swat it with his “fully-loaded” mobile phone. Halimaw ay sinusunog at screamed sa kamatayan, at Roy kinuha ang pagkakataon na humampas ito sa kanyang mga “ganap na nai-load sa” mobile phone. “Not on my new sofa, you sucker!” “Hindi sa aking bagong sopa, pasusuhin mo!”

Oh, Kuya Roy, who is the one to pasusuhin mo raw? LOL!


And last but not the least kay Jan:

Jan ay tweeting, humuhuni tiririt tiririt kapag dalawang Cro-Magnon-gusto nilalang bago lumitaw ang kanyang doorsteps handa na pumatay sa kanya sa kanilang mga nakamamatay na baluktot na lakas at matutulis na fangs. True to his skills as a Knight, he immediately took his armored black helmet and wore his black leather jacket. Tama sa kanyang kakayahan bilang isang Knight, siya agad kinuha ang kanyang mga armored itim na helmet at wore sa kanyang itim na jacket na gawa sa katad. As one of the monsters tried to strike it’s sword to Jan’s head, he “exhaled” on it hundreds of tweet messages. Bilang isa sa mga monsters sinubukang hampasin ito ay tabak sa Jan ng ulo, siya ang “exhaled” ito sa daan-daang mga tiririt ng mga mensahe. The monster fell on its knees because of the sheer volume of tweets and Jan instantaneously used his helmet to crush the monster. Halimaw Ang nahulog sa kanyang tuhod dahil sa manipis na manipis ang lakas ng tunog ng tweets at Jan instantaneously na ginagamit ang kanyang helmet sa crush ang halimaw. “@Jan_Geronimo: Right at your back!” A fellow twitter-buddy sent a tweet on his screen and Jan immediately jumped off the window and landed on his scooter. “@ Jan_Geronimo: Karapatan sa iyong back!” Isang kapwa kaba-buddy ay nagpadala ng isang tiririt sa kanyang screen at Jan agad kumuha ng puwesto off ang window at lupain sa kanyang scooter. His donorcyle’s engine roared running 20kph off the roads of Mindoro. Engine Kanyang donorcyle’s roared tumatakbo 20kph ang paglabas sa daan ng Mindoro. As the monster ran furiously after him, Jan shifted gear and headed towards the ugly monster and hit it with his 20kph blinding speed. Tulad ng halimaw sa ran furiously matapos na sa kanya, Jan shifted mekanismo at mga buhok patungo sa pangit halimaw at pindutin ito sa kanyang mga 20kph pagbulag bilis. The second monster died and vanished. Ang ikalawang halimaw namatay at vanished. This knight then tweeted, “I’m all well. Ito kabalyero pagkatapos tweeted, “ako sa lahat ng maayos. Two down, buddies! Dalawang down, mga kaibigan! James Dean here.” James Dean dito. “
Tumitiririt-tiririt ka pa na know Jan ah! Heheheh!


Well, I am medyo getting to used to this na, conyo translation , and it made me hulog from my chair because of kakatawa!  Hope my post made you tawa too.

How about you guys, have you subok na translate your blogs posts gamit the H2H plugin?  What ang mga discoveries nyo?  Were you natawa rin ba? LOL! Buhol-buhol na my tongue!

Image galing from Matt Ryall

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